Trigger warning for description of psychotic hallucinations, mentions of drug addiction & alcoholism

Schizoaffective Disorder, a fusion between Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia, combines the symptoms of both. I was diagnosed with it three years ago after a lifetime of Bipolar I with psychotic symptoms. I could say the results were shattering, but in a way the diagnosis was a relief: to have a name for the paranoia, the white vans following me whenever I left the house, an explanation for the voices, the dialogue constantly critiquing my actions. The schizophrenic break came that terrifying summer after graduating from an MFA program with no prospects and huge debt, but perhaps I should begin at the beginning.

Tags: Abilify, addiction, alcohol, ativan, bipolar disorder, cocaine, delusions, depression, diagnosis, disability, domestic violence, Fanapt, friends, hallucinations, hearing voices, hospitalization, isolation, lexapro, mania, medications, paranoia, promiscuity, psychosis, schizoaffective disorder, schizophrenia, self-medication, shaming, SSDI, Tegretol, Topamax, Wellbutrin, Zoloft

My lack of privilege comes with a choice. A choice to be visible, or invisible. People prefer invisibility, especially when someone else is unlike herself, or perhaps far too much like himself. Lucky for me, it is not my responsibility to dictate what others think of me.

Tags: choice, growth, honesty, identity, openness, pride, privilege, scars, self-acceptance, self-hatred, self-love, shame, stigma, visibility

Wow, I can’t believe a whole year has passed already since I created Queer Mental Health. Thanks to the hard work by all our writers, this website has grown into a strong website with high-quality content. Did you know we’re getting hits from all over the world, even from countries where homosexuality and transsexuality are illegal [...]

Tags: birthday, news, outreach, QueerMentalHealth.org, social media, thanks, writers

In the article on the DBT Chain Analysis I mentioned labeling cognitive distortions. To give you a better idea of what I am talking about, and to clarify what the more common ones are, I have listed them below. If you require further clarification, I have also included the source cited. 1. Filtering – filtering [...]

Tags: always being right, black and white thinking, blaming, CBT, cognitive distortions, control fallacy, DBT, emotional reasoning, fallacy of change, fallacy of fairness, filtering, global labeling, heaven's reward fallacy, jumping to conclusions, overgeneralization, personalization, shoulds

Trigger warnings for description of sexual assault, description of self-harm and suicide methods. PTSD. Four letters that mean so much. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It’s quite a misunderstood illness. I’ve heard many people ask, “can’t you only get that if you’ve been fighting in a war?” Most people don’t know what the symptoms are, other than [...]

Tags: anger, anxiety, avoidance, bipolar disorder, counseling, depersonalization, depression, dissociation, emotional memory, emotions, fear, flashbacks, grounding, hallucinations, homophobia, hypervigilance, insomnia, marijuana, melatonin, moving on, nightmares, panic attacks, paranoia, pot, PTSD, relapses, self-harm, self-injury, shame, sleep, startle reflex, suicidal thoughts, therapy, threats, transphobia, triggers, verbal abuse, violence

Who doesn’t want freedom from rapidly spiraling and/or out-of-control cognitive and emotional cycles? I know I do. A couple of months ago, after a particularly grueling weekend during which my emotional and cognitive processes completely derailed, leaving me feeling like an empty trainwreck, I spoke with one of my counselors and he suggested we do [...]

Tags: actions, body sensations, breakdowns, chain analysis, cognitions, cognitive processes, coping strategies, DBT, distorted thinking, emotional cycles, events, feelings, identifying triggers, labelling distorted thinking, mindfulness, solution analysis, thought patterns

I’m sick. I have chronic illnesses which cause me lots of pain and fatigue. The specific names and causes of my illnesses are not important (and not even totally known by me or my doctors). I spend a lot of time in bed. Sometimes even weeks at a time. This is not something I have [...]

Tags: ableism, access to resources, alternatives to capitalism, anti-capitalist communities, bed, burn-out, capitalism, chronic illness, classism, community resources, corporate ladder, daily living, disability, fatigue, heterosexism, lazy, marginalization, mutual aid, networking, pain, poverty, production, racism, relationship development, self-worth, sexism, sick, social capital, survival, values

I have been vegan for over 6 years. Being vegan definitely evened out a lot of things for me including mood swings and a lot of health problems. All of those extra animal hormones, and if you believe in that sort of thing, all of that suffering from their treatment, was no longer entering my body.

Tags: attention span, autism, B vitamins, bipolar disorder, brain fog, celiac disease, dairy, dairy-free, depression, diet, food addiction, gluten, gluten-free, learning disability, mood swings, psychosis, recovery, schizophrenia, stability, veganism, whole foods

Trigger warning for mention of incest

…I love the definitions of stigma and mental illness. They complement each other so well, don’t you think? Kind of like a cocktail, a drink made by mixing various spirits and/or fruit juices…and any hybrid mixture…and any number of different drugs used together to treat a condition. I personally like 1 part stigma to 2 parts mental illness: it has a nice little kick to it. Combine the three and well, whew, you have a real drink here. I – a person – can only be facetious about this. If I wasn’t I’d be blubbering all over this keyboard.

Tags: adolescence, BPD, childhood, coming out, depression, family, gender identity, history, homophobia, incest, lies, school, self-care, self-love, Shakespeare, stigma, transgender, voice, wellness

Hi readers (and writers), I apologize for my lengthy absence. As you know, the people who contribute to this website are people who live with mental health issues and/or mental illness. I am no exception. I live with bipolar II disorder, and in the last month, my moods have swung from a hypomanic high to [...]

Tags: absence, bipolar disorder, bipolar II disorder, depression, editing, hypomania, mood swings, readers, submissions, writers